Talk:The White Enderman Part 1/@comment-6395730-20140303165846

...This is... eugh. Let me point out some flaws made in the first couple sentences.

1. The format. What's up with it?

2."An Enderman, whom's color, was white." That's not how you use the Oxford comma or the word 'whom'.

3."His eyes were white as Diamonds, and his T is like the sea." First of all, you switched tense in the middle of a sentence. Second of all, diamonds aren't white, and the word shouldn't have been capitalized. Third of all, "his T is like the sea"? What does that even mean? What is "his T"? You don't describe how it's like the sea, and worst of all, you never even say who "he" is.

This is terrible.